I regret to inform myself and my close family and friends that I did not, in fact, win the Millionaire Life lotto draw yesterday. I know I already put a down payment on that yacht and that I quit my job and bought a car. I know I already booked that trip around Asia... but I guess I'm going to have to return it all.
Thats right, no more gold plated plates to eat dinner from, no Dom Perignon for bathwater, and especially no hundred dollar bills on my toilet paper roll. I was reckless. I thought the lottery was my ticket to a life of luxury, but I didn't win.
I better go find a job now, I have a lot of things to pay back. Donations are greatly appreciated.
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